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Download Author: Holman, Beverly


15 eBooks available.

Preface and Introduction

This book has been written for survivors of incest who want to explore both how the sexual abuse may have affected their sexuality and what they can do about it. Intimate partners of survivors and therapists who have clients who are survivors may also find this book useful in developing a supportive and understanding approach to sexual concerns. Special sections have been written with partners and therapists in mind. (20 pp.)

Sexuality: Why Bother?

There are many survivors who feel ready to develop their sexuality in a positive way. For them, it is worth the time and energy necessary to explore their sexuality because of their strong desire to experience sexual pleasure and contentment. (14 pp.)

The Exploitation of Children

Incest lacks all the essential conditions for positive, healthy sexuality. There is no true consent, equality, respect, trust, or safety. Incest perpetrators use their victim’s age, dependence, and immaturity to their advantage. They selfishly exploit the innocence of their victims. (18 pp.)

Family Influences

Understanding family influences can benefit survivors. They can learn how each member of their family contributed to or was affected by the incest. Survivors learn that psychological problems suffered by older family members may have set the stage for incest to occur and to remain hidden. Self-blame is alleviated when survivors realize that what happened to them would have happened to any child of their sex entering the family when they did. This understanding helps free survivors from feelings of guilt and responsibility and thereby allows them to strengthen their identity apart from their family of origin. (35 pp.)

How Survivors Coped During Molestation

This chapter will discuss some coping methods survivors have used during molestation. It will also describe the role these methods later played in hampering sexual satisfaction. Problems can arise when survivors continue to employ old coping methods in adult sexual relations where there is no longer any threat to their well-being. Since coping methods were developed during traumatic situations, they tend to be deeply ingrained and hard to let go of. (19 pp.)

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